In Case Of Emergency, [Unexpected Error]

I have said before that new situations are difficult for me, but generally they are only partly new, with some base in behaviour I know. When things happen that are completely alien, I have no clue what to do, so I often do nothing. This has happened a few times in my life and I'm going to list a few, starting with the least significant.

Of course you, the reader, don't know me, but those who do know that I am always articulate, have a wealth of information ,and a counterpoint to every argument. This is all true within the normal realms of conversation. But very occasionally, someone will ask a question which I have never had to think about before (possibly of a personal nature).
In these situations, it's like the wires aren't connected, the file's not found, there's nothing behind Door Number One. My mouth goes to form a word, then... nothing. This has happened possibly 3 times. As a side, the most awkward of these situations was a guy asking me if I would date his girlfriend given the chance, while she was standing there.

I once observed a man stumbling down the street with the weirdest gait I've seen. He was quite a way ahead of me when he fell down, and there were people around him to see what was the matter. In fact, a car stopped to see if any assistance was needed. He waved them off, got up, and carried on his way.
He made it about 100ft before he fell again and there were still people around who could help him up. He waved them off too. As I passed the would-be helpers I hear them say they could "smell it on his breath". I didn't know the guy, but I had been a little concerned, maybe he'd been hit by a car, I don't know. I assumed he was drunk, but that's not really a good state to be in by the roadside.
Next time he fell, I was the closest person to him, but I didn't rush to his aid when he fell, I just carried on at normal speed and went straight past him. Was that the best thing to do? I don't know, but neither did I know what needed to be done.

I rank this higher, because it affects someone I know. A friend informed me that one of their parents was quite ill - hospital grade ill. I've had very few hospital related incidents in my life, so I really didn't know how severe it was. Either way, I though I should be a supportive, or at least well-meaning friend.
But what does one do in that situation? Are you supposed to say "wow, that really sucks" in sad tones? Are you supposed to do the whole "If there's anything you need..." spiel? I'm pretty sure about this one but are you supposed to inquire as to the nature and fatality of the 'illness'?
I settled for the "Hope they get better" with a follow up some time later. I just hope they recognised that I'm not good at this and took heart that I cared.

The final incident I'll describe you may possibly think is the most heinous, but remember I was (and possibly still am) poorly equipped in all necessary aspects to deal with the situation.
I was at home one day, and since it was a nice day, had the window open. I heard the clatter of a ladder and an 'argh!' from through the window. I had a look, but could see nothing, and without going house to house, had no way of knowing where it came from. Yes, I did think he might be injured, but I didn't here any further commotion, so I put it to the back of my mind feeling a little bit guilty, but assuring myself that it was more likely that her was fine.
I later found out that it was a workman working on a house while the owners were out. He fell off his ladder and injured his spine. The ambulance crew took him away. From what I heard, he recovered with no serious complaints. But it must have been a few hours before he was discovered, and I can rationalise away my behaviour, or I can blame myself, but I felt I would have some kind of meltdown if I tried to help, and that's not helpful.


These are situations where I felt I could do nothing, or didn't know how to act. I've said the best way to deal with this is to practice, but I don't want to practice these.

(Awkward) Silences

People say they don't like awkward silences, and that's fair, but I think the term 'awkward' is often misapplied. When an inappropriate comment is made in public conversation, it is called an awkward silence. When two people are waiting for, or are in, a lift and they don't talk, it is called an awkward silence. If someone holds your gaze for an extended period of time, that's awkward too.

But why they are awkward has always puzzled me. In the case of the lift (or elevator, for US occupants), my view is that I don't know this person, and there is no immediate need to speak to this person, so I don't. I have talked to an NT about this, who said that it seemed odd that people wouldn't talk to each other considering that we are all part of the human experience.

We are all people, yes, but where in society does it say that we must engage everyone we see in conversation? Perhaps society would be a friendlier, if noisier, place for this, but it would be less functional. The fact that NTs feel uncomfortable in silence is something they might want to look at. Perhaps it goes back to the fact that NTs try to read signs that aren't there and Aspies just don't read the signs. Maybe the NTs aren't picking up a vibe from the stranger next to them, or across the room from them, so feel unsure about the situation. Maybe people with AS are oblivious to the awkward feeling from the other party, so don't reciprocate it.

I'm still a little confused about it, but I don't feel the need to talk to people in order to break the silence. If their discomfort at no conversation is too much and they need to converse, I can overcome my discomfort with small talk to make them feel at ease. Usually, it's quite concise and results in silence, but a silence in which all parties concerned feel somewhat at ease.