Wonderings

Is the best thing really to withdraw? By avoiding any situation in which one can be hurt, one supposedly avoids it. It might not be considered a good or happy life, but I say look at Sheldon Cooper. Although fictional, he represents a very real personality type. Often dragged out as the quintessential highly gifted aspie, he finds enjoyment in intellectual pursuits. Relationships are designed for fulfillment - the biology of the involved is such that the bond itself can bring happiness. This is not only true of romantic relationships (although the endorphin release may be much greater), but of social relationships too.

Similar to other aspies, I have perhaps a different classification of friendship than neurotypicals. I don't know what their system is, or even if they have one defined (I've never asked), but mine is very clear in its tiers.

Top tier - significant other:
This bond is thought of as unbreakable, while it provides high fulfillment of emotional needs. No important secrets, and absolute trust. Things in this relationship are as facts.

Second tier - close friends:
There are no more than half a dozen I would call close friends. These people know I'm aspie, and I sometimes talk to them about it. I confide in them. Money isn't an issue and items can easly pass between us. I don't tell them they're in my 'inner circle' but they might suspect it.

Third tier - friends:
They are who I socialise most with. Probably long time acquaintances, I'd be comfortable around them, but still put on a bit of an NT act. We share small talk and I don't have any issues with any of them. I would trust them with something, but nothing vital. For example my DSLR: only select few people are allowed to touch it, and only my family after hesitation.

Final tier - acquaintances/people I interact with:
This would be people I went to school or uni with but didn't particularly befriend combined with people I refer to as 'service people' (no offence meant, it is simply how I classify cashiers, ticketpeople, sales assistants, and the like) and people I see regularly who I don't intend to befriend.

This may explain why I have less than half the average number of 'friends' on social networks. But I don't care, they can't really have 400 friends... that's more than one per day. Can't be done.

Part of me thinks I could just invert in to my own little existence, not getting to know new people, wanting things to be the same. The rest knows it's impossible, and would probably end in depression. It's best to just get on with life, I suppose. And hell, I might even enjoy it.