"Why Don't You Smile More?"

I was once asked the question “Why don’t you smile more?”. It wasn’t out of the blue, or accusatory, I believe it was out of genuine curiosity when I refused to smile at something amusing. And I thank the person for asking me this question; not at the time, though, because I didn’t have an answer then. My recent hiatus from posting here has coincided with a period of self-analysis, or what you might call “finding oneself”, so I feel more able to answer that question.

My natural reaction to something amusing or funny, or something that makes me happy is, like any human, to smile. It’s intrinsic, we’re born to it, we don’t have a choice. But of course we can control the muscles in our face (at least the major ones), so it is possible to restrain a smile once it has started. So that’s what I was doing, and that’s what got noticed. A side note: something that supports the left-brain right-brain theory is that I smile predominantly with the left side of my face, which is connected to the more emotional and less logical right side of the brain. That’s what people were presented with when I tried to hide a smile: the slight extension of the left of my mouth and a bit of a squint. Charming.

The question you might be asking is why. It’s nothing to do with social acceptability, or even the tribal instinct for group acceptance and positive reinforcement. If fact, it’s the opposite of smiling for safety, it’s ‘not smiling’ for safety. It stems from the sad thought that opening up emotionally will not only let in good feelings, but bad ones. This has some scientific basis, but is not the way to a healthy life.

Negative experience (negative feedback) is a much stronger behaviour modifier than positive feedback. So the desire not the experience a negative is greater than the desire to feel a positive. Here, drink this – it’s either vanilla or earwax flavour. Do you drink it? The optimistic would say yes, but the realist and the pessimist would say no (the pragmatist would probably say yes, because no matter what it was, it was a free glass that he could fill with something else). I suppose as examples go, there are better... Either way, I didn’t smile, so I didn’t open myself up to negative emotions.

But that doesn’t work. Take an umbrella so you don’t get wet. Oh, you stepped in a puddle? Take waterproof socks and trousers. That’s silly, and I don’t use that word lightly.

What am I saying…? Don’t wear an emotional dry-suit. And smile more, it makes you happy. Science said so.

The Aspergian Brain

I don't profess to be a neuroscientist, or any other brain-studier, so what you read here may not be 100% accurate, but it's what I can pull together about how the difference in 'wiring' produces these different results.

The Frontal Lobe:
I understand that it controls/regulates things such as emotions, some motor skills, impulse control, long term memory, and decision making. Studies into children with AS have found that there is reduced activity in this area when making a decision. This is purely my speculation, but I'm thinking that the further along the spectrum, the less this area reacts. Think Rainman - Raymond was completely unable to determine right from wrong, or to decide his future.

Also, deficiencies (or deviations from the norm) in this area could mean a reduced emotional response or emotional competence. If the neurons aren't firing like those of NTs, then behaviour will be different. Interestingly, the frontal lobes are involved with the sense of humour, and I know that some Aspies are described as lacking in that department. Quite importantly, the area believed to be involved with detecting deception, irony, and sarcasm is in the frontal lobes.

If there is simply a difference in structure, and not a deficiency in brain chemicals, this may explain the single-mindedness - the ability to be completely absorbed , the stubbornness, even the genius. Research into adult Aspergians has found higher levels of protein in the frontal lobes (cerebral cortex). This same difference may also be linked with the difficulty in social interaction. The communication between parts of the brain may be hindered by the different layout or concentration of hormones.

More activity in this region could account for better non-task memory: fact recall.

The Amygdala:
This is supposedly where the emotions are decoded. If they are incorrectly decoded, or the message is misinterpreted at the other end, then I believe that would result in 'emotional incompetence'. As this is also the area that deals with threats and senses. This could explain why some people have sensory overloads: they perceive 'normal' things as threats or as bad things, and this part of the brain takes over, trying to get the body away and possibly warning others (wailing and jerking).

Possibly, the difference in the structure means that people with an ASD could be hyper-vigilant or unable to shut certain things out. The amygdala is in constant contact with the cerebral cortex, and if it thinks there is  danger, it will be sending more messages to the frontal lobes, causing anxiety.

It has also been linked to social emotional processing (empathy).


If anyone with learning or knowledge in this area wishes to contradict me, please do, as this is all speculation based on perfunctory research.