Fatigue, weariness, tiredness. Three things on a spectrum. Fatigue occurs after a prolonged period where physical or mental faculties have been overtaxed. Many Aspies either have experienced or will experience fatigue at some point in their lives. Asperger's is sometimes known as 'wrong planet syndrome'. This is effectively true, especially when thrust in to the working world.
Most types of employment involve some levels of stress. Not yours? Imagine sitting by a cool pool in warm weather with no cares in the world. Now imagine your job. Stress. Most jobs involve forms of social interaction. No example needed here unless you test code in a darkened room all day, or spend your nights measuring light pollution. Social interaction. A person with AS may not notice that it takes effort, because it always has - this is normal. Also, it is a fact that many schools of management think that specialisation increases work efficiency. Why bring that up? Let me phrase it like this perhaps: Are you tired of doing the Same Thing Every Day? Some people may like it, but for others the endless performance of one tasks s demoralising. Uniformity.
These factors contribute heavily to fatigue, but for most Aspergians, the constant social environment is the perhaps the largest factor. This may be why we have been "traditionally" unable to maintain full-time employment (cited in a lot of literature, though I have never seen any raw data). From my own experience, fatigue is very real. There are a variety additional factors in my case, such as the feeling of futility and impotence to change the ineptitude of low level management, giving me a sense of fatigue. Such that, I have taken two weeks off work simply to do nothing. Easy for some, you might say. Well, yes, I do have the means to take this break, and I certainly had the motivation. I still don't feel entirely at ease, and am due to return to work on Monday. I shall have to see how quickly the fatigue returns. But right now, it feels necessary, because for every week working, I felt increasingly tired in my bones. I've been employed for under 1 year.
Interesting post.
ReplyDeleteHow long have been the longest you held the same job?
I kind of self diagnosed myself and find a strange conflict between my curious nature and craving for predictability. I get quite upset if I'm draged back and forth between tasks and need the task be well defined no to be confused, but ... But I get bored to death when I think I do what ever I do already "perfect". Than I can do it for a little while more but not for ever. Also I think this "time limit" coincide with the time when social isolation is ripe. I have nothing more to ask as I know what I'm doing and I'm not that new to be interesting any more ... probably also start to look plain boring. I cannot break out of this cyrcle and keep changing my workplace after 1-2 years... or at least think of it.
What do you think of this situation?
I have only ever had this job, and I'm in to my 13th or 14th month of it. Before that, I felt fatigued after 2 out of the 3 years of university. I think your point on social isolation is valid - negative changes in environments have preceded times of fatigue, but not always.
DeleteA point we're both making, I think, is that there is nothing wrong with predictability and routine, provided there is a point to the activity. When you feel you're not making an impact, you can get a sense of futility, which leads to fatigue.
As for your question on your situation, it's not ideal. Though that does depend on whether you are able and prepared to find new work regularly. If you find that's what works, then do it. Set a limit shorter than your "isolation threshold", and find somewhere else to work after that period of time. If you can make this decision, it may make you happier.
Most people prefer stability though, so what you might hope for is one job that gave you all you wanted. If you feel it's too late to change (and it rarely is), and to be interesting (and new doesn't always equal interesting, and vice-versa), then the next time you go somewhere new, try your hardest to perfect the social aspect as soon as possible. I have found that the largest factor in whether or not I get tired is the company I keep.
A thought - it may be completely the wrong direction - but have you considered project based employment? The task is clearly defined, with a start and a finish, and you can know you'll move on to the next thing when you've finished this one.